Over Half-Way

2627

As many may lament the quick and sudden disappearance of this year, I find myself at odds with said feeling. For you see I am also struggling to comprehend how we are only at the middle of the year. It is the 6th July,  we are 27 weeks into the year and another 25 weeks awaiting us. Since the reinvigoration of my blog with the posed challenge of writing weekly posts, accumulating 52 posts before the year is out, I have been meticulously watching the weeks drip by. Each week has been filled with me researching topics, trying to find something to write about, desperately vying for inspiration, battling for a new angle, to struggle for hidden depths and unturned metaphorical stones. Every time I pencil in the number of that weeks post all I can think is how do I still have X amount of posts to go, do I have any more ideas, what else can I write about, what is interesting to me and maybe possibly to a wider audience, what? So I see the weeks stretch out before me calling for new ideas, new topics, new inspirings, new nonsenses, just something new. And I love it.
Just as much as it seems I may hate it. I truly love and enjoy these writings. I love the challenge every week of creating something new, I love where my research and thoughts can take me. Nearly every post I produce has a story behind its conception of some ilk to attribute to it. Nor has any post, bar the oddities, stayed as they were originally intended. With some dovetailing so wildley I can no longer pinpoint it’s true origins while others haven’t made it further then a sentence or two before they’ve been scrapped only later finding a home in a larger piece. I never know where my piece is going to lead no matter how good my intentions are and no matter how well I already know my intended end game of the piece. The initial reasoning of rebooting and retooling this blog was to help improve my writing abilities outside of the blog itself. I thought the idea of regimenting myself to weekly deadlines would help encourage me to think and search and discover a little more. To make me more willing to pen my flights of fantasy and dreams of costumed crime fighters that rattle around inside my head.
Having now surpassed the halfway point of the year and my blog and coincidentally the halfway point of my notebook in which I handwrite all of my ideas and posts as first drafts I have seen some dramatic and surprising changes in short time span. A change not wholly restricted to my writing but in my readings, my interests, my understandings and my outlooks, in my outreach, my interactions and my sharing of all the mentioned above. In my daily life if asked what I was up to I would mumble about work and a few things I was working on before eventually touching on this here humble blog. I would post it weekly to Facebook and forget about it moving on to the next, occasionally chatting about it with my devoted readership of my mum and dad and girlfriend. Now however online I shout about it, hitting every form of social media I own weekly to spread the good word of that weeks post. I find myself engaging online in more new and frequent ways with each passing post and positively too. I’ve had conversations with absolute strangers of which all I know of them is their online handle accompanied by a dodgy profile picture and yet they have been fascinating conversations about how they discovered my pieces and their thoughts on them and how it related to them. Which hasn’t only encouraged me to continue my posting but to do the same and rather then hitting a like button or the share icon. To reach out and engage with the creator offering them my encouragement and appreciation. It may seem like a small thing but for someone who is willing to share their creative works it is most certainly a big deal. I’ve seen it also bleed into my actual life. With people I haven’t seen in ages or while stood around the water cooler chatting with colleagues they’ll say, “how’s the blog” or “I read that thing you did on…” and it astounds me everytime that people are taking notice, reading and enjoying what I consider nonsensical ramblings. I have always been one of those people that has always doubted theirselves, what I do and the work I produce. I have always been unwilling to share my scripts and ideas I toil away on, forever stopping something I deem not good enough before swiftly moving on to the next doomed piece. To actually have faith in and not be burdened with the fear of sharing and putting my work out there is really something. But to the have that, months down the line, rewarded with small tokens of appreciation and to spark interest and interaction within another is truly something else.
25 posts to go you say, I’m thinking I could add another 52 to that.
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